Words. I’ve always loved them. I love reading them, I love writing them, and if you know me at all, then you know I love speaking them. Writing releases something in me. It feels kind of like holding my breath for a really long time and then slowly exhaling. I’ve actually been contemplating the blog for a long while now; Two and a half years to be exact. I kind of kept hearing God nudge me, and I ignored Him or really, told Him to back off- I didn’t wanna. Don’t raise your eyebrows and get judgey… we all do, at some point, disobey or disregard God’s call.
•”It brings up too much…”
•”I don’t want to…”
•”Let someone else!”
•”Don’t make me!”
“My words don’t carry weight for anyone except me. I’m the only one who gets my words, or my life, or my struggles, or my successes. I dont want to be TRANSPARENT Lord, PEOPLE WILL SEE ME!!!” 😂 It’s easier to NOT put yourself out there. You can’t be judged as harshly when you keep all of your junk wrapped in a neat little bow.
•”No one will care! Why in the world would anyone care about reading anything I wrote? Who cares!?”
I do. Jesus does. I realize that those are the only two people that truly matter in this scenario. There are only ever two things to ask yourself when it comes to your dreams, or hobbies, or career, or goals. (1) Do I enjoy it? (2) Will it glorify God? If you can answer yes to both of those questions, then you should stop making excuses immediately and run! Some people have a call to teach, some to create, some to inspire, some to cook, some to love, some to build… some to write.
I had people tell me ALL the time to write, and it wasn’t until I had someone tell me that “God gives us gifts to use for his glory”, that I really started thinking seriously about it. My putting excuses on why I shouldn’t- actually started to feel like God was telling me to do something, and I looked him directly back in the face and said “No”. And let me tell you something… The Lord won’t let you get away with that for very long before He really starts to deal with you, so good luck.
•”I don’t write well enough. People will think I’m dumb. Or it’s dumb. Or my thoughts are dumb. Writing brings up too much I don’t want to deal with.”
If you dont know, I’ve done this before. A blog, I mean. I started one several years ago under completely different circumstances. I won’t go into great detail (right now, or ever again, I haven’t decided…) but it was a really painful time for me and my family, and I just wasn’t sure that starting a blog again was something I wanted to do, because I don’t want to face the past. But the past is exactly what that means, behind you. Everyone has something, don’t they? And should you deny yourself good in your future, just because of the bad or sad things in your past. Of course not.
And then, sometimes when I write my words down, it makes them real. I can’t escape the words or thoughts when I’m literally staring at them. And then I have to deal with them like God’s been telling me to. I don’t know about you, but working through things and bringing them to the light is not fun. I have to deal with my jealousy, or lack of faith, or yuck, or sin and it just sucks to be quite honest. That part is never fun. But walking in a new lightness and peace always comes after, though. The rainbow that the Lord always promises shines through and I get to walk with a new freedom.
So this is my push for you. Go ahead, start the business, or the blog, or the class, or the hobby, or the sport, or the thing. No one ever accomplished anything by doing nothing. Nearly every night I sing “This Little Light of Mine” to the girls, and I just thought it time, that it start being a living testimony instead of just a bedtime song. Don’t waist gifts or desires God lays on your heart. “Let it Shine, Let it Shine, Let it Shine…”